Back to Front - a new trend

I was staggered to read that the current interior trend is to stack your books with their spines to the wall.

Yep, so you can’t see the titles. Apparently, it creates a calming atmosphere and the sculptural qualities of the books comes to the fore. It also negates the worry (worry? what worry?) of how to group your books. Alphabetical. Genre. Author or title. Colour coded, perhaps. Oh, for goodness sake, whatever next?

Well, funny I should say that because I am going to get hipper and trendier this year and take a lead from the quite obviously razor sharp, at the cutting edge designers and plant my plants back to front. Yeah, get a barrow full of that Chelsea Flower Show.

You know how sunflowers follow the sun, well they have the right idea because they always face away from my garden. Following the sun as it sets in the west. No sunflowers for me. No, no, no. I don’t want those bright and cheery much beloved blooms to look at. No way. Let them look to the west. West is best, especially as I want them to face east.

And as for those devilishly hard to place roses with all those superb flowers, healthy foliage and ornamental prickles. Plant them where I can’t see them. That’s the answer to all that dastardly colour combination and planting of shrubs.

However, it is going to take a bit of time to turn the shed around so that that door, that practical door, is at the back so I have to scramble over soon to be used cloches and negotiate an overflowing water butt. No one wants an easy to use shed. It’s so upsetting and so yesterday.

I might take it even further. I’m thinking garden structures and, in particular, my wooden obelisks. There was a bit of a trendlet for upside down Christmas trees because they make more use of the available space. So, we are told. Hmmm? Obviously, my obelisks take up far too much ground space, tapering to a point at the top. Easy. Let’s whip them out, spin them over and - voila - instant trend and great use of aerial space. But what about the sweet peas I plan to grow up them? I’ve sown a packet of mixed colours. It will cause turmoil. Better nip out the buds before they flower. Play it safe. And cool. And on trend. All things neutral in love and war. Or something like that.

Ok, it’s madness. Of course, it is.

But in defence of the spines to the wall theory, other than calming and relieving decision making, once you’ve read a book you hardly go back to it. I get that. I’ve read many books, but how many more than once? Not many. But plants are different. Not being big headed, but I’ve seen many sunflowers in bloom in my time (what a show off!) but I will never tire of them. I cannot get enough sweet peas in my life. Ever. And my roses. I challenge anyone to want to banish them to face the wall wearing a dunce’s hat.

Gardens are to be looked at, pored over, devoured and digested. Time and time again. Visit a garden and you'll see many things. Revisit and you will see more. Same in your own plot. Study it, immerse yourself in it and it will always surprise.

So maybe I should reread a few of my books after all. If only I knew which one to choose off the shelf because all the spines are now facing the wall and I can't tell one from another. Curse those trend setters!